Where there’s light there’s darkness… When people from childhood onward learn only about following the rules that are handed down to them, even if on a silver platter; that not pertaining to the rules is followed by severe punishment; and that questioning the rules actually is out of the question…they would necessarily feel tempted to break those rules.
In other words: When as a grown-up one still does not feel to be the master of one’s life and the decisions in it; when you haven’t learned to think for yourself, look at consequences and ask about good or bad, why and for whom – you will look with awe at those who do. With some admiration perhaps.
And eventually people will either start following an apparently strong “leader” – or they will feel urged to break all the rules ever imposed upon them – and become what Schiller in his epic poem “The Bell” called “mankind in its fury” (“…der Mensch in seinem Wahn.”).
To become a truly responsible and self-confident civilian, a member of a democracy, to my mind the awareness of self-management, of being in charge of one’s life and taking responsibility for one’s actions, is crucial.
Otherwise people will repeat those patterns – and we will see hate and lack of self-esteem erupting into fights and killing, over and over again.
This movie is considered one of the best-loved movies ever to come out of Hollywood. Frank Capra has a gift to focus on the essentials in life and make them visible – with emotion and brains. The forces of all those that don’t care a penny for other people – or their lives, who do anything to win – and be rich – are there. They seem to always have been in the history of mankind – and will continue to do so. Only the counterpoise of the wary good makes this world a place with smiles and love every day.
The modern society – perhaps even generated in the US with the idea that everybody is responsible for their own luck and ultimate ‘success’ – has created an image of life that is difficult to overcome.
Some fairy tales of old times seem to state it just like it:
Heroes overcome obstacles, tackle the bad guys – and ultimately win the cup, the jewels – and the princess.
These days it may come in more toned down colours, in a manner of speaking.
But everyday life is full of the little wonderful things, if you care to look closely…
Let’s make it a point: Be a counterpoise, each in their place, to the best of our ability. An African proverb is said to go like this:
If many ‘little’ people in many ‘little’ places do many ‘little’ things every day – they can change the face of the Earth.
“Evil” is not some mystic and mysterious force with superpowers that rises somewhere from a fiery underground, staring you in the face with red eyes and breathing stench and fire.
A fine and not yet so modern phrase is: “Evil is that evil does.”
And that is entirely true. Before the advent of enlightenment and the civil society which also introduced the same right for everyone, evil was a term in religious contexts to make people afraid and manipulate them. Ghosts frequently played a role in that kind of thinking as well.
With the rise of a common basic education the term was critically reviewed and by and by found ‘old-fashioned’ and misleading.
But we need to come back to a modernized idea of it to state dangers more clearly:
EVIL is what people do by adhering to destructive values.
The values that worship money, the rich, the powerful, no matter what.
Some sort of currency is needed to make sure you can take care of your daily, basic needs. It wasn’t always money people used to exchange goods. Shells, sometimes even rare and beautiful ones were common in some parts of the world.
But whatever it is people use, when they start worshipping the wrong things and thus values we will get into trouble – such as the US currently are facing with a non-entity as their intended head of state.
How to Know Good?
The most basic two phrases putting it in a nutshell are these:
“Avoid pain.” For everyone.
“Act in a manner that the principle of your actions could be transformed into common law any time.”
The first is the Buddhist concept.
The second is my translation of Immanuel Kant’s categorical imperative, that great philosopher of the 18th century and one of the leading figures of the enlightenment.
To get to the bottom of truths you need to take time to think. At first that could take some practice too.
But don’t worry! Because anything human beings do or create can be understood by other humans – even if it takes a little more time at first!
So in case you were wondering how to know evil from good, these are the yardsticks to use:
“Does it avoid pain?”
“Could the action/behaviour be transformed into general law for all, any time?”
Whoever told us that life is either wonderful harmony – or we will have war? In the sense that you cannot have it both ways?
Da…n and blast to all who believe it! Is it that male (patriarchal) idea that you have to have predominance and prove ‘strong’ by shouting at people a lot? Because that way you establish ‘authority’?
Maybe. But war is not a question of gyms and some old-fashioned training ideas!
The civil society brought an even more wide-spread understanding of responsibility and the preference for peace and calm that let us thrive for a good life and good relations in peace.
Conflicts are a natural part of human life – always were, always have been.
(Cruel) arguments or wars are not ‘natural’.
They are the consequence of a mindset that values predominance and ‘first place’ the most. To force your opinion or your preferences on people is – according to that idea – a sign of strength and power.
BUT – and this is one of those BIG BUTS – it is a question of perspective:
Because anything that causes pain and suffering to many people – and additionally over a long period of time – is not a good thing! Period.
There are many ways out of conflict, some are short, because the conflict is small.
Some ways are long, because the conflict is large.
But whatever it is, if we respect the fundamental human rights we will do all the negotiating it takes, even if years, to avoid pain and suffering. Full stop.
Screenshot taken from democrats.org at 18-08-2024_15-44-37 CEST — showing Kamala Harris, Joe Biden and followers
The former president D. Trump running for office again and being part of that party misleadingly calling itself “Republicans” is not to be pitied.
I wonder if it wasn’t a ruse even — that attack. But that is actually not really important at this time. He is neither to be trusted nor is he a good man, or ever was.
He has hurt thousands of ‘little’ people during the 1970s that had trusted him and his enterprise, ruining their existence by taking their money and getting out in time himself.
He was best buddy to president Putin in Russia, who even supported his election the first time using illegal, online measures that have been proven.
Link to the Pulitzer Prize committee‘s official site, stating that fact:
Seems he is billions of dollars ‘worth’ — but when you look at his deeds (not his words) you will find it proven, too:
He ist not worth your vote.
Why Democrats? Because although being human and thus not flawless — they are the only ones smart and strong enough to prevent the hell of a second presidency of that Republican sorry-excuse-for-a-man.
Vote for peace and equality.
It’s the Bible even, that says it clearly:
“You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes, or figs from thistles?”
(English Standard Version, 2016)
Monday already the ruling was out and amid an uproar of news flashes there’s some comfort…the Washington Post explains
(screenshot taken from here at 05.07.2024, 05:59 h (CEST)):
Screenshot from Washington Post Website
Personally I think it’s not overly surprising when you think of how the majority of the present Supreme Court Justices came into office: They were named and instated during that former president’s time in the White House.
Let’s hope and pray – and keep going for democracy! – for a better and eventually true-to-their-best-roots society, especially in the US.
Because three dictatorships all across the world is too much even for this planet, namely Russia, China and a would-be president D. Trump in the United States.
Ancient Rome had seen similar situations: A huge empire that grew, benefited the few – and saw Caesars as well as dictators for centuries.
There’s no doubt about it, war is always a means to an end…which is tragic and cruel, no doubt about that either.
Yet, war has some striking differences to other kinds of conflict in human life!
It practically never happens over night, without any warnings or talks in advance, usually power and money are involved. At the same time, in practically any case you may want to look at in recent or ancient history, the fame or the dignity of a country or its leader(s) was a ‘bone of contention’ as well.
The diverse political societies and international organizations show the will to ‘power games’, and also the need for a sort of balance in power.
There’s always a way, if we keep talking and negotiating, in politics — as well as in every day life. The recent problems apparently occurring between Iran and other nuclear power-holding countries could have been avoided, if under the last but one US-government the contracts with Iran hadn’t been cancelled — completely irresponsibly. Where it had taken close on ten years negotiating those in the first place.
One very deciding aspect of eventually successful negotiating is ‘putting yourself into your opponents shoes’. Try imagining what it would be like to be on their side, even if only for a while.
Alas, it seems, every generation has to learn all the lessons of the past all over again. That’s why proper and enlightened education is so crucial for our children! And grandchildren and great-grandchildren, because: As long as this planet and its peoples are revolving, living, breathing, I refuse to call any generation ‘the last’!
In other words: Where’s life, there’s hope!
So many of the forecasts of also recent as well as ancient history proved to be wrong!
To ‘throw in the towel’ long before anything is desperate or dead, really, is no option.
The traditional, age old approach, not to say unwritten law, is this:
Woman is decorative, enticing, alluring and eventually going out of her way to please a man/men.
Men look at women and judge them (sometimes harshly) by their looks.
When somebody decides in this ‘game’, it’s the man, who takes the steps, makes the move.
The woman is supposed to show her utter delight with the fact that the man actually ‘deigns’ to take notice of her and perhaps even is willing to have sex or – God forbid – a relationship with her…
Behind it is the yet strong but older concept of women being dependent on men, for provision and – protection.
The idea that women live for themselves, depending on each other rather than men is even older, though.
This is another aspect of love and (power) relationships I have posted more than once about… a central subject in human art forms, apart perhaps from war…
Another not so pretty example is what can happen in business and has been even subject of major Hollywood feature movies such as “Disclosure”, 1994, starring Demi Moore and Michael Douglas: The power relation traditionally being the man in power and the woman almost forced to have sex with him in order to stay safe, in place – or get promoted.
It’s been reversed for this movie – and at the time caused a heated discussion as to how realistic the movie was – or if it wasn’t rather making the story too voyeuristic to be of any real value…
I am personally lucky to never actually have been subject to such treatment.
Partly due to my personal preference I believe to choose rather than be chosen…
Yet, my heart goes out to all of those women who still for one reason or another feel compelled or even forced into relations – rather than relationships – because they fear to be alone; to be without a man; and be ultimately judged by that fact by the community or their surroundings.
Finally, one point I’d like to raise too is another craze I seem to have observed in the course of a rather long life:
The idea that as a woman, indeed a human being, you would naturally be inclined to have sex on any occasion presenting itself because in modern times we’ve learned it’s natural…? The more the better…?
I’d like to point out that there is ample proof of man (and woman) being in possession of what has been called a soul 😉 – as well as a body – and that a human body is more than the sum of its parts…
I am, simply put, for that equation:
Every man and woman ‘their way’ – as long as we are talking about consenting adults.
I like too, how it was put in that fine scene from the movie “Harry and Sally”, considered to be a classic these days:
Can I say anything definitive about it – when so many others seem to have failed? There’s romance to be considered – and jealousy, there’s loneliness that sometimes makes people rush into things; there’s fear of rejection, and heartbreak. The stories and plays, poems and songs that have been made are legion; I wonder if not the whole of mankind is seeped through and through with the eternal quest for love and passion and safety – and often in vain.
I always wondered why people are and behave the way they do. Why? Pain, especially. Why would people cause others pain on purpose? Revenge is also a subject in that sphere…when emotions or just pride are hurt and people start out on a hunt, as it were, to avenge themselves.
There are the archetypes that C.G. Jung, a successor of Sigmund Freud, defined: Symbols as figures, ideas of human types of behaviour, such as the bridesmaid, the bride, the damsel in distress and so on.
Many ideas we come in contact with are involved with the idea of love. The very basic longing for harmony and closeness with another human being that Erich Fromm called the need for overcoming the feeling of separateness (quoted from memory).
As most of us I have gone through some pain in that respect myself – as well as some joy.
There are patterns of human behaviour, male and female that you often find mirrored in (usually) cheap movies and stories: They ‘feed’ on those stereotypes and can be rather distracting, if you do not look beyond the images. For your own truth as well as of that of the other person.
Patterns of power relationships are involved, deeply sometimes and most of it not consciously: In patriarchy the man is to be supposed to be always cool, calm, collected and ‘on top’ of the situation. That means that he may tend to look for a life partner slightly his inferior in education, upbringing, or income, in order to feel like a ‘real’ man.
Women in turn may easily tend to look for a ‘strong, superior’ man in order to fulfill those roles.
Sometimes these roles are a safe bet.
Sometimes they are not.
The basics I learned to be true too, by reading, observation and my own experience are these:
We tend to look for a partner who understands – us.
Passion may perhaps be easy to come by – if you are not too particular; some apparently get ‘sozzled’ with intake of substances to make that part easy. Some buy it.
Some wait for a long time to combine the ‘nature and nurture’, the experience and personal liking with a ‘soulmate’, in love and passion. My special regards to all of you people of like minds!
Whatever you do, remember these two ideas, to me they make the most sense of all:
In passion: All is fair as long as it is not done with children – and not by force. Consenting adults.
In love: “Whatever works.”
References:
Erich Fromm: The Art of Loving (Die Kunst des Liebens, German)
Alexander Lowen: Love, Sex and Your Heart (Liebe, Sex und Dein Herz, German)
Steve Biddulph: The Making of Love (Wie die Liebe bleibt, German)
Paul Watzlawick: The Situation Is Hopeless, But Not Serious: The Pursuit of Unhappiness (Anleitung zum Unglücklichsein, German)
Gerti Senger: Alles Liebe (German)
